There are days (or weeks) when everything feels like too much. Deadlines pile up. A loved one gets sick. You forgot to respond to that email, again. The laundry’s overflowing. Your mind won’t stop spinning. You’re doing your best—but life still feels like it’s happening to you, not with you.
If you’re nodding along, you’re not alone. Chaos can sneak up on anyone—especially those who are constantly juggling work, parenting, relationships, and the invisible weight of “keeping it all together.”
The good news? You don’t need to have everything under control to feel more in control.
At Be My Life Coach, our certified life coaches are here to help you find your footing—even when everything around you feels shaky. No judgment. No waiting. Just real-time support, whenever you need it.
Let’s talk about how to reclaim your calm in the chaos.
The Illusion of Control—and Why It Hurts When We Lose It
We live in a culture that praises being “on top of things.” We’re told to plan ahead, stay organized, and handle challenges with grace. So when life gets messy, it’s easy to feel like we’ve failed.
But here’s the truth: control is often an illusion. Life throws curveballs—unexpected layoffs, relationship stress, health scares, toddler tantrums, broken appliances, you name it. Feeling out of control doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. It means you’re human.
So instead of chasing total control (which none of us really have), let’s focus on something better: inner steadiness. That grounded, centered place you can return to—even when everything around you feels uncertain.
How to Feel More in Control (Even When You’re Not)
Here are powerful but simple ways to regain a sense of control, no matter how unpredictable your world feels right now.
1. Shrink the Circle
When chaos strikes, your brain tries to solve everything at once. That’s exhausting—and paralyzing. So, shrink your circle of concern.
Ask yourself:
- What’s actually mine to control today?
- What can I let go of, even just for now?
Try this:
- Make a list with two columns: “Things I Can Control” and “Things I Can’t.”
- Focus only on the left side of the page.
This small shift can release you from carrying things that aren’t yours—and help you focus on actions that are within reach.
2. Create a Micro-Routine
You don’t need a perfectly structured day to feel grounded. Just one or two predictable touchpoints can restore a sense of normalcy.
Examples:
- Make your bed as soon as you wake up.
- Brew your coffee the same way every morning.
- Write a three-line journal entry before bed.
These “micro-anchors” give your brain a sense of rhythm—and rhythm feels like control.
3. Use the 5-Minute Rule
When everything feels overwhelming, motivation often disappears. Instead of trying to do everything, try doing something small for five minutes.
- Tidy one drawer.
- Open that email you’ve been avoiding (but don’t respond yet).
- Do a quick brain dump on paper.
Momentum builds from micro-action. You don’t need to fix your entire life before lunch. Just begin.
4. Pause Your Inner Narrator
When you’re overwhelmed, your inner voice can turn critical fast:
- “I should have handled this better.”
- “Why can’t I keep up?”
- “Everyone else seems fine.”
That voice isn’t helping. Try replacing it with self-support, not self-sabotage.
Practice saying:
- “I’m doing my best with what I’ve got.”
- “This is hard, but it won’t last forever.”
- “I can take this one step at a time.”
And if you can’t do that on your own, that’s where our coaches come in.
5. Connect with a Life Coach (Yes, Right Now)
Sometimes, the best way to feel in control is to stop carrying the chaos alone.
At Be My Life Coach, we make support simple:
- No waitlists
- No contracts
- Just certified life coaches who understand your chaos—and your potential
We’ve helped thousands of people through relationship stress, career crossroads, family overwhelm, and that all-too-common feeling of “I can’t do this anymore.”
Our coaches don’t just listen—they help you strategize, reframe, and breathe. And sometimes, that’s all you need to feel less alone in the storm.
What You Can Control Right Now
When everything feels chaotic, it’s easy to believe that you have no power left. But even in the middle of overwhelm, there are small, meaningful choices you can still make. These may seem simple, even insignificant—but they’re not. In fact, they’re the building blocks of resilience and stability.
Here’s what you can reclaim today:
- Your breathing: It sounds basic, but your breath is your most accessible tool for calming your nervous system. Take a slow inhale for four counts, hold for four, and exhale for six. Repeat it a few times. You’re telling your body: “I’m safe, and I’ve got this.”
- Your schedule—even if just 10 minutes of it: You might not control your whole day, but you can take ownership of a small slice. Block off 10 minutes to step outside, make tea, or sit in silence. That time is yours—and it’s a powerful reminder that your needs matter too.
- Who you talk to and ask for help: You’re allowed to ask for support. Whether it’s a trusted friend, a partner, or a certified life coach, reaching out is a sign of strength—not weakness. You don’t have to figure it out alone.
- The way you talk to yourself: Notice your inner dialogue. Are you criticizing or comforting yourself? You have the power to change your tone. Try speaking to yourself the way you’d speak to someone you love. Gentle. Encouraging. Kind.
- The decision to pause, even for a moment: You don’t have to power through every second. Give yourself permission to pause. Breathe. Reset.
- The choice to start over—again and again: Today didn’t go as planned? That’s okay. You can begin again at any time. Right now counts. So does the next moment.
Control isn’t about mastering everything. It’s about choosing something—and reminding yourself you still have power, even in the mess.
Final Thoughts: Control Isn’t About Perfection—It’s About Presence
You’re not weak for feeling overwhelmed. You’re not failing. Life is simply a lot sometimes. But even in the middle of chaos, there’s a way to steady yourself.
You can’t control every twist and turn—but you can control how you care for yourself along the way. You can choose to pause. You can choose to ask for help. You can choose small, steady actions that keep you grounded.
And you don’t have to do it alone.
FAQs about How to Feel More in Control
âť“ What can a life coach do for me if I feel overwhelmed or out of control?
- A certified life coach offers real-time support to help you make sense of what’s happening, organize your thoughts, and take meaningful next steps. They’re trained to guide you through high-stress situations with calm, clarity, and compassion.
âť“ Do I have to book an appointment or commit long-term to work with Be My Life Coach?
- Nope. There are no contracts, subscriptions, or pressure. You pay per minute and connect instantly when you need it. Whether it’s a 10-minute talk or an hour-long session, you’re in control.
❓ What if I don’t know what I need help with—can I still talk to a coach?
- Absolutely. Many of our clients come to us feeling “off” but not sure why. You don’t need to have a plan or even the words to describe how you feel. Our coaches are trained to meet you where you are and help you figure it out together.
